Tuesday, February 11, 2014


I recently (in the past 30 years) have realized that we are all crazy; sliding around somewhere on The Continuum of Crazy. Maybe you're the "crazy cat lady", kookoo for Cocoa Puffs, experiencing that Time Of The Month or suffering from Grouchy Old Man Syndrome - or maybe you're all the way over to the right, the certifiable, NAMI defined, impossible-to-live-with CRAY.  

Even the recent coining and viral embrace of the phrase "cray" implies a certain affection (and acceptance) for crazy behavior. "That's cray" is the much cuter, bouncing baby sister of "CRAZY!!!" It's an evolved way of calling out behavior without putting the "crazy" sticker on your forehead. And that's a good thing - because no matter how "healthy" or "together" you are - sooner or later Cray says, "come out to play-ayyy."

I, for one, have the tendency to be constantly checking myself for signs of cray to "collect data" to properly find where I fall on the Cray-tinuum. 

I've discovered that I also use others to accurately place myself on the continuum of crazy on any given day. If I have spent time on the internet typing in your behavior, waiting for a proper diagnosis to pop up, you are one of the people that helps me validate my belief that my cray is better than yours - or less than yours, and therefore supporting my cray notion that I am "righter" than you.

A friend of mine referred to me as "Crazy Glue" - a diagnosis/term of endearment defining who I  am in relationships - the implication being "they"flock to me like moths to a cray. Which begs the question, what is the attraction? Do I have an air of cray that implies "cray's ok by me!" Is it a silent reciprocal no harm/no foul contract? Or maybe I simply like focusing on my partner's "quirks" in order to avoid the painful self-dive.  Or maybe it's just that I like my men big, brooding, and unpredictable vs.  "bookish" or "overly neat." The truth is, my "type"makes me crazy, which sometimes just feels good - in a 'crack-feeling-good-to-a-crackhead' kinda way. 

Sometimes "crazy" is mild, or an addiction, or a diagnosis with prescription, it doesn't really matter; at the end of the day it just IS. And the sooner we embrace it in ourselves and in others the better.

So how 'bout we all just own up to our crazy and cut ourselves some slack. Call me crazy.